[28 Mar 2005|05:02pm] [ mood | worried ] First off.. people need to stop talking shit. No one knows anything and it's no one's business about anything going on. I have to hear this bullshit from one of my best friends.. That makes me feel like a whore and shitty. And it fucking hurts. People don't know me or my life or the shit I've been through. No one understands shit.. And really needs to drop everything and people.. Jesus, instead of talking about me worry about your own fucking lives. Don't focus on mine.. because according to everyone I'm a dirty slut and whore. People are dumb. Happy Easter to those I don't hate. Or day after Easter. Hah. Well Easter was alright. I woke up at Matty's. I love waking up to my boyfriend. I really do. He means the world to me. That is the only thing that makes me happy anymore. Because everyone else just stresses me out. I feel like I have no friends or anybody anymore. It sucks. It really does. But I woke up and me and him ate breakfast and talked to his mom, Gary whatever. Then his mom brought me home around 11:30 so I could spend some time with the fam. Since my dad made me an Easter basket. We had a hunt thing, I'm almost 18, but I still find it entertaining and fun!! Haha. Yeah then my dad brought me back to Matty's and me and him did whatever talked to his fam and did whatever whatever. It was good. :). My dad came to his house around 5 and talked to his fam for a while ate there whatever. It was good. Matt's gram has a crush on my dad!! It's so funnnnyyyy. Yeah then me and my dad left and had a talk about everything. Well I miss my mom so much. I wish she was here.. Things would be better. She didn't deserve to die. I cried so hard last night. I miss her so much. 8 delicious pop it

[26 Mar 2005|11:35am] [ mood | hungry ] I have this song in my head. It'll be here for a while. This vacation type thing hasn't been bad at all. I just wish that I didn't have to go back to school. Even though I don't go much anymore anyway. I'm definitely dissapointed in myself. Whatever, I love Matt. Haha, yeah I've been straight. So yesterday woke up at Matty's mad tired and naked. Haha, and chilled in the morning. Then about around 3 we walked to Ernie's ma's. She talked to us about some shit for a while and they smoked and drank some Smirnoff while I sat there cause I don't fuck around with that shit anymore. Me and Matt listened to music in the bedroom and watched TV. Then we talked to Matt for a while when he came home. I guess he has been riding around in his truck everywhere and he gets paid so much freaking money! He gets like a thousand a week. I think that's a lot atleast. Hmm. Yea. Me and Matt left and chilled with Mike back at Matt's house for a little. OMG I AM SO FUCKING STUPID. So I see the soda I was drinking before on Matty's table so I go over to drink it. It felt a little bit warm. Right when I started to swallow I remembered that Matt had peed in it!! Stupid freaking me forgot, runs to the bathroom while the boys are laughing at me basically puking it up in the sink rinsing my freaking mouth out! It was so freaking bad. Haha, but Matt still checked on me to see if I was ok. But that was in the inside joke of the night. So then me Matt and Mike left to go back to Ernie's ma's to go chill with Matt. We went and they drank while I sat there covering my mouth and nose from the stupid smoke of the weed. Nasty. Because that smell bugs me now. Yeah ok. I gotta go get ready and do whatever because I have to go up to the mall with Matt his uncle and mom to go get my cell phone and do some Easter shopping. I have about 70 buckarrooosss. Peace out bitches and hoes. 2 delicious pop it

[24 Mar 2005|06:18pm] [ mood | nauseated ] I am sick and bored outta my freaking head dude. Chillen until 8 when Matty gets home from nightschool. Gunna just sleep here again. Blah. :). I love it. Soooo today was interesting. Me and Matty chilled for a while. Walked down to Walgreens. I had to pee like one thousand times. He's like Geeeez. I was irritated by everything to. I was being a major bitch to him. Guess he's gunna have to get use to it because, trust, it's gunna get worse. Then we got back and we smelled pot and so his grandma came over, she was so mad. It was coming from Mike's room and she called the cops on him. He didn't get in deep trouble though. Yeahhh. Then me and Matty went and watched the baby for a short while at his grandmothers so she could wait for the cops to get here, who never came anyway. Yesirr. Aw and then the baby fell and bumped her head. I felt so bad. But yeah we watched her, and then his gram came back and me and Matty walked to Walgreens and he bought axe and a phone card. :). We got back and left again to go get cigerettes because I ran out but he bought me 2 packs. Damn, gotta love the kid. He spoils me like crazy. Then he left for night school and his gram came over and we talked for quite a while about a lotta stuff. She is so freaking awesome. I felt so much better talking to her. I mean I told her stuff about how much I miss my mom and how she misses her husband. It was good for me to talk to someone. I usaully feel like I have no one. Then Gary and Matty's mom came home. They talked to us for a little and his gram sad she didn't want Theresa over here anymore because she is scared she will ruin me and Matt's relationship. Which by the way I wouldn't be surprised. The last thing I need right now is for me and Matty to break up. :(. That would fuck a lotta things up considering.. well nevermind. But then me and Gary played Crazy 8's. He won. I was mad. Haha I felt unlucky. Haha. And then they said they wanted to bring me out to eat. But I feel shitty as hell and didn't want to go. I feel like I'm dying and shit. So they left with the baby a short while ago. And I'm here chillen doing whatever. I basically live here so they don't really care. So I'm here with my stomach bothering the shit out of me, worrying about what I'm gunna tell my dad tonight and in the long run (Uhoh, he's gunna be mad at me), and eating dry oatmeal beacuse it's calming my stomache down. I'm bouta go watch Half Baked. I wish I felt less shitty. Okay bye. :(. 2 delicious pop it

[24 Mar 2005|09:43am] [ mood | amused ] I gotta wait and callmy dad later. He scares me. Lol.. Hmm I'm at Matty's. I slept here last night. I'm watching his sis while his mommy does dishes. She's being good as usaul. Hmm he is outside shoveling. I hate snow. Too much snow. It's suppose to be Spring. It's not fair. Well last night I met Ash at Bentley and then me and her walked back to Matt's and hung out upstairs just talking about shit because me and her hadn't chilled in forever. I missed her like crazy. Yeah so we chilled and watched the Patriot. Best movie ever! And then played with Marissa until the boys got back. (Matty and Nut) Hehe. We chilled upstairs with them just talking about shit. It was good. Then me and Matty did some really important stuff and smoked. Hehe. Yeah bye. 2 delicious pop it

[23 Mar 2005|04:33pm] [ mood | hungry ] Lalala. It has really been a crazy day and I have to call Matt in a couple minutes to let him know hissister is good. I'm babysitting her at Matty's. Ah I love you Marissa. I love this baby! Sheis making me laugh in her little red car. Hehe. She is just pi,mping back in her little car eating her cheerios. She's so frekaing easy to watch. She is a good baby. Hmm today really has been quite crazy though. First period I went to the studyhall in the cafeteria and talked to Nick Brielle Matt and Billy. It was frekaing fun! Lol those boys entertain the crap outta me. Yeah so we just chilled in there talking about my parties and how crazy they were. I should have another. Haha. Yeah right, and get bagged again. That would be splendid. Haha. Yeahhh so... Then I left to go to Mattys. Smile. He was mad when I first got there. Not a big suprise but we just chilled at his house for a while. I love him. Hmm then we went and talked to his Grandma Gary and his mom for a little. We thought something was up with somethingnot going into it. But that was the talk of the whole day. I'm kinda disappointed I'm not. I'm sure they all got the picture. But I guess it would be better if me and him waited anyway. Then my boy Ernie showed up. He picked us up in Carly's car and we went for a ride. I'm tellin you man, that kid drives like a crazy dude. Worse then a crazy dude. Wooowww. Lol. Matt was like chill niggah. Hehe. I said the same. Went around looking for small stores that we hoped would have a prepaid phone  for Matty. But none did. So we went back to his house and then Ernie shows again with Kyla. We ended up racing to Best Buy and he got a phone. I paid for it. Wow, I felt like such a wife. And he bought me a nice Easter present but he won't tell me what it is. Well I heard Theresa was talking a lot of spit about me last night to Matty but she was just over his houes with me today and never said shit to me. She was being all nice and shit. She's not ugly but she isn't pretty. She's alright. Well I gotta call Matt at five and then meet Ash up at the school to pick Matt and Scott up at 8 from nightschool. Imma bounce and finish paying attention to this kid. I love Matt! 4 delicious pop it

[22 Mar 2005|07:50pm] [ mood | content ] Hmm, what a interesting day. I guess. People are absolutely retarded. Yes, and I have another new journal. Actually I had my other one for a while. I just felt like changing it. I just hate writing new friends and shit. So yes, if you want me under your friends then guess what? Add me<3. Yeah so today was absolutely boring. And I feel absolutely guilty about some shit. Not saying what but I'm guilty. Just my boyfriend has been going to nightschool and I promised him something that I didn't keep about school and stuff. Oh lordy. I love him. Hmm, so yeah first period I went to history. Me and Stephanie mad fun of Buggy and his matching shoes. We enjoy ourselves in that class. All we do is watch movies. Then Wesleigh said something about Will. It made me smile. Lol. Haha, Wes. Hm, yeah and then we just kinda laughed and shit. Me and Stephanie. Dude I miss that freaking chick. I haven't been with her in forever. Which is why we should definitely chill this week. Because tomorrow is our last day before 2 days of vacation!! Wow exciting. Yesirr. Then I walked to my babys house. Oh my lord. I love Matt so much. Yeah I get there and he is so happy because he is doing good in nightschool and so me and him just chilled in his room because when I got there he was cleaning and everything so I helped him pick up and shit and make his bed. He loves how I make his bed so I do it for him everyday. Lmao. Even though the first couple times I really fucked his pillows up. Lol. Ok, question. He is so wierd about his bed. What is the point of making your bed if your just gunna be back in it having sex? Just a thought. Duhhhh! Haha. Hmm. I left at 10:25 to get back to school to work on the History project me and Blondie had to finish. We sat in the library at first because Dumb and Dumber here forgot the poster board. Of course, our luck. Haha. We are the biggest and dumbest dorks ever. Hmph. So we talked to Alyssa Roy. Who by the way, is the by-far coolest chick ever. We talked about a buncha shit. Haha, we are absolutely retarded in the library and then me and Stephanie went to lunch. Chilled with this wierd lesbian girl in the bathroom and then I dropped my icecream. That was the horror story of the day. Wooowww. Did that shit suck. I picked it up and ate it anyway. 5 second rule bitches! She was roolllinnnn. Hehe. Then I walked back to Mattys. Wow, it was absolutely gorgeous out today. So Matty Gary and his mommy and Marissa were the back yard chillen and decided that we were gunna go to the DMV's so he could get his ID for school. First we went out to get food and I got pizza. Hehe. And then Matt and me had a cig in the parking lot in the car jamming the crazy music and shit. It was alright. Then the DMV musta taken us 3 hours to get in and out of. Matt's mom and Gary dropped me off at my counsling appt., which sucked major dick and a half. Yeah and now I am home. I better go call Matty in a few because he gets outta nightschool soon. I was gunna go back to his house after counsling to go watch tv and shit and chill with his mom but I feel bummy and don't feel like going anywhere. Plus, I truly wanted to say goodnight to him. Well I'm out. I love you Matty. 2 delicious pop it

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